Perspectives

My Daughter Is Calling Her Stepmom “Mom” Instead of Me

A mother’s worst nightmare is seeing her child grow apart. That is the truth for Joy, whose teenage daughter is gradually requesting less time with mom. Joy took it upon herself to investigate, only to discover that her ex-husband and his wife are involved in this mess. She has turned to us for guidance, sharing her tale and asking for counsel.

My ex and I divorced 8 years ago, and we share a daughter who visits him on the weekends. Things have been smooth over the years, but recently our 14-year-old daughter started asking to go to her dad’s and stepmom’s house more often.

 

She’s even calling me “Joy” instead of “Mom.” I brushed it off, thinking it’s normal teen behavior. But the other day, I heard her call her stepmom “Mom.”

I was furious and decided to search her backpack. To my horror, I found that they are giving her expensive makeup, fancy rings, and beauty products she’s been asking me for a while.

Suddenly, everything started to make sense. My ex has way more money than I do, and it is obvious that he is buying his daughter’s affection with material things. I know that his wife never liked me, so she’s using that money to get closer to my teen, and as a result, my child is becoming more and more distant.

I don’t even recognize my own kid anymore. I feel helpless at this point; it feels like I am losing my daughter. What should I do?

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